WILLIAM'S OZARK BIBLE INSTITUTE ADVENTURES NUMBER 6
Part 6: The Gang's Arrival William, Cody and Brian were fined $250 each by the Residential Assistant for their earlier actions. They were given a stern lecture about how they were "against God's word and headed 'straight for Hell' due to their behaviors". They were also told about that night's special guest, named Steven Anderson, who didn't take nonsense from anybody, and how they were to be on their best behavior during his "hell-fire" sermon. Three and a half hours later, the sermon began inside the chapel. The College President walked up to the podium. College President: "Good evening everybody to this special sermon! Before we begin with out guest-pastor, let's begin in prayer." The Congregation bows their heads in prayer, including the three "troublemakers" (they were threatened with public shaming if they didn't comply). College President: "And now please welcome our guest from Tempe, Arizona: Pastor Steven Anderson!" Pastor Steven Anderson walks up to the podium. Steven Anderson: "I'm pleased to be here, everybody! I have been holding this in for a month, and now I finally get to let it out! May I just say how great it is that Chester Bennington is dead and burning in Hell?! I mean, that guy was a HUGE fornicator and blasphemer; not to mention he wore tattoos, which are itself an abomination! I feel no sympathy for his sodomite family, not his friends or other relatives!" The Whole Congregation (Except for the "Troublemakers"): "Amen, brother! Yes, amen!" Steven Anderson: "I had been praying for his death since 2011 every night. His music is beyond Satanic, I can't even listen to it without fainting. July 20, 2017 was the greatest day of my life since June 12, 2016." The Whole Congregation (Except for the "Troublemakers"): "Amen, brother! Yes, amen! Screw those sodomites!" Steven Anderson: "I see we have a group of three here not cheering on. Tell me you guys, why aren't you praising the Word of God like everybody else?" William: "Because we think you're stup..."Interrupts Cody: "Because we don't agree with your harsh comments toward innocent individuals!" Steven Anderson: "That's the Devil taking over in you three! You three sodomites need to understand that the people in that nightclub were perverted criminals who deserved to be shot." Brian: "They were not perverted! Just because one classifies as LGBT doesn't mean they're perverted!" Steven Anderson: '''"I feel sorry for you guys, for you three will feel the wrath of Hell when you die!" '''College President: "I'll take it from here, Pastor Anderson! Boys, you three are sentenced to five hours of community service this Saturday for disrupting yet another service! Not GTFO of my sight! Pronto!" The three leave the chapel, along with their Residential Assistant. As they exit the chapel door, the Residential Assistant sprints up behind them, kicking William to the ground. He then sweeps down Brian and Cody. The three stay on the ground in pain. Residential Assistant: "You three have caused ENOUGH drama this week! Not only that, but I am now going to receive ten demerits for leaving a service early. You c*cks*ck*rs are in dead meat with me tonight! You three better be in your dorms when I come back from chapel! Otherwise, you'll be in the hospital for a whole week!" The three slowly get up. Their knees and/or elbows are scraped with minimal bleeding, but no major injuries. They walk back to the dorm. William: "I wonder what that pig is going to do to us after Church?" Brian: "He'll probably make us write lines, or do punishment-like endurance training." Cody: "Maybe he'll just complain to us again!" Two hours pass, as the three get back from the RA's office. The three were sentenced to 15 flogs each. Brian: "I can't believe we're going to get paddled on Saturday! This can't be legal in college." William: "It's going to hurt SO bad! I hope I don't embarrass myself by crying during the paddling." Two days pass. The day is Friday, as the the three sit in their dorm room awaiting a call from Tina, Angry Grandpa or Psycho Dad. The Residential Assistant walks in. Residential Assistant: "WILLIAM! Your mom is on the phone! Come quick!" William walks to the phone room. William: '''"Hello." '''Tina: "I'm not your mom. I only pretended to be to trick your Residential Assistant. Listen, I caught a flight to St. Louis along with Angry Grandpa and Psycho Dad. We're set to be at the Ozark Bible Institute in two hours. Be ready and pack up your belongings!" William: "Sure thing, bye!" William returns to his dorm room. William: '''"Guess what guys! We're busting out of here tonight! Angry Grandpa, Psycho Dad and Tina Dandridge have come to get us out of here!" '''Cody: "Can they get past the security gate?" Brian: "Of course they can. Psycho Dad and Angry Grandpa will destroy the gate while Tina curses out the guard." Pickleboy's Perspective Two hours have passed, as Pickleboy, Angry Grandpa, Psycho Dad and Tina Dandridge arrive at the Ozark Bible Institute. Pickleboy turns on his camcorder. Pickleboy: "So Dad dragged me all the way to Missouri just so he could save his 'YouTube friend'." Angry Grandpa: "Would you be quiet! THIS...IS...REALLY...IMPORTANT!" They arrive at the front gate, and put their plan into action. Security Guard: "Welcome to Ozark Bible Institute! May I see some identification before proceeding!" Tina: "I'M NOT GIVING YOU NOTHING OLD MAN! Security Guard: "Miss, you need to calm down!" Tina: "DON'T YOU TELL ME TO GODDAMN CALM DOWN!" Meanwhile, Psycho Dad takes out his baseball bat he brought from Sports Authority right after landing at the airport, while Angry Grandpa takes out his hammer. They easily bust down the gate. Tina: "SEE YOU LATER!" Tina slaps the Security Guard, and the four drive toward the campus. College President's Perspective The College President types on his computer in his office. College President: "I can't wait to whip William, Cody and Brian tomorrow! Maybe then they'll finally learn." Just then, his office door collapses. Appalled, he notices Psycho Dad with his baseball bat. Psycho Dad: "What ails you, old man? You're holding my friend hostage in his dump!" Angry Grandpa: "You tell us where he is right now! Or I'll bust you with my hammer!" College President: "You two aren't going to see anybody tonight. Because I'm calling the police!" Tina: "I DON'T GIVE A F*** WHAT YOU SAY OLD MAN! WHERE ARE THEY! WHERE ARE THEY!" Angry Grandpa and Psycho Dad lock the College President in his office closet. Psycho Dad: "Let's go find them!" Category:Ozark Bible Institute Category:Ozark Canon Category:Fanfic Category:Trip Disasters